I work with parents, stepparents, and couples.
As a coach to you and your family, my main goal is to bring you back to that place inside yourself, where you know that who you are is enough. In fact, it is more than enough.
You have all that you need, all that it takes to be a great parent, stepparent, and partner in life.
And here’s one thing I’ve learned about kids.
You can trust your child to show you exactly what they need. The problem is often that in the day to day compression of parenting we don’t see the signals clearly for what they are. And when we as parents do get what our kids are telling us, we may not feel that we have what it takes to respond adequately.
Working with me, you will unravel what your kids need. And then we’ll find the practical tools you can use in the everyday reality of your busy life.
We will base our solution in science. I will bring, in easy to understand language, the latest in brain science that explains why our children behave the way they do. It will clarify what is at times bewildering about them. And then we’ll apply that knowledge to the specific situation of your family.
You will know that what you’re doing is what you should be doing.
Parenting is emotionally challenging and nobody can be expected to do it alone. As much as you are enough, you still need concrete support. As your coach I will be your main support person for a while (or one of them). In our time together, you will come to a place where you know to organize and access your own support system—for all the years you will be parenting.
As a stepparent you create the parent-child connection against the odds, especially in the beginning. Whereas children are born to want to connect to their parents, they don’t express such desire towards their stepparents. I know it from personal experience.
Yet you can absolutely have a wonderful and fulfilling relationship with your stepchild where you can help them receive your love and guidance in the most positive way. It may take overcoming some challenges at first, and you will learn how to see your relationship differently from that of the other parent(s).
You will find ways to have a rich connection, filled with love. The signals of that relationship are there. You will learn to uncover them, recognize them and cherish them. And then you will be a fantastic parent, ground under their feet.
And for couples who struggle, no wonder. Parenting in this day and age is terribly hard on relationships.
The role of being in a relationship is that you and your partner lift each other up. When you are no longer lifting each other to a better place than you could be alone, you can return to that place, where you draw out the best in each other. You can find a way back to a life brimming with excitement and wonder just because of the person you get to be with.
As a couple you may need to figure ways in which you can simply maintain a way to feel connected to each other, a way to feel that you truly love each other.
Or perhaps, you need to find a way to see eye-to-eye on parenting. When we parent, we bring the ways in which we were parented with us. And you’re coming from a very different history, it may be difficult to see how your partner’s parenting style helps raise happy children.
Whether you need help for your relationship or to find ways to match your parenting styles, contact me. I am sure that what binds you is strong enough to overcome all that sometimes makes it hard to be in a relationship.
If you really want to save your relationship, you will! That is what I have seen over many years. When couples struggle the question is really: what do you want? If you want to stay connected, you will find a way. It starts with your intention, and the rest, we will figure that out together.
Working with Niels
So let’s see if we can work together. You can write me right here. We can set up an initial phone conversation to see if we can be a match and if what I offer is what you need.
I look forward to hearing from you.